Tag: Parenting

How do I homeschool my 4-year-old?

She’s going into kindergarten this year,and I wanna know what things I should be teaching her over the summer.She’s already been to pre-k,so she has a basic understanding of abc’s and #’s.She can count to 39, recite her abc’s,spell her own name, and can kinda write.

Written 26 May 2017

Teach her absolutely nothing!

Young children should enjoy their childhood. They will learn everything they need to know by playing.

If these statements appear too drastic, then consider the following research.

Early Academic Training Produces Long-Term Harm

Despite the initial academic gains of direct instruction, by grade four the children from the direct-instruction kindergartens performed significantly worse than those from the play-based kindergartens on every measure that was used.

How Early Academic Training Retards Intellectual Development

What a finding! Benezet showed that five years of tedious (and for some, painful) drill could simply be dropped, and by dropping it the children did better, in sixth grade, than did those who had endured the drill for five previous years.

(1) For non-schooled children there is no critical period or best age for learning to read. Some children learn very early (as early as age 3), others much later (as late as age 11 in this sample). The timing of such learning doesn’t seem to depend on general intelligence, but upon interest. Some children, for whatever reason, become interested in reading very early, others later.

(2) Motivated children can go from apparent non-reading to fluent reading very quickly. For motivated children, who are intellectually ready, learning to read requires none of the painful, slow drill that we regularly put children through in school. Many children pick it up without anything that looks like a lesson; others ask for some help, which may come in the form of a few lessons concerning the sounds of the letters.

(3) Attempts to push reading can backfire. Children (like all of us) resist being pushed into doing things they don’t want to do, and this applies to reading as much as to anything else.

School starting age: the evidence

Several European countries are delaying the introduction of academic instruction until later, as a result of research such as this.

Read the research.

Let your children play!free to learn


I am trying to decide on an appropriate kindergarten homeschooling curriculum for my autistic spectrum son. Does anyone have any suggestions?

I am not in a position to recommend any specific strategies for your autistic spectrum son.

However, in my (rather extensive) research on schooling strategies, it appears that starting formal schooling too early can actually be harmful.

Parents may be sending kids to school too early in life, according to Stanford researchers

School starting age: the evidence

So, what are the alternatives? Again, there is a fairly rich body of research suggesting that we should let our kids play. (Pretty radical idea … not). I suggest you take a look at some of the writings of Dr. Peter Gray.

Freedom to Learn

Lastly, my opinion.

I have come to believe that children learn best when they are learning about things they are interested in, and enjoy. While I don’t have extensive experience with autistic spectrum children, those that I have encountered seem to become engrossed, occasionally in some really fascinating areas. I therefore believe the unschooling approach to learning is very valuable. (Once again, Dr. Peter Gray writes extensively about unschooling).

Okay, I said I was done, but I had another thought, and wandered off on some additional research.

It occurred to me that the Sudbury school system might be appropriate for autistic spectrum children. A quick google search turned up a number of interesting articles, including this one:


Anyway, the Sudbury type school may be a very helpful and appropriate choice for your son, so is another avenue worth checking out.

The Middle School Years – by Rosemary Ward Labaree

This post is for the many, many homeschool families who ask me about the middle school years and how best to prepare for high school when a competitive college admission is the ultimate goal.

I’ve met many parents of middle school students who feel stranded.  They want to be prepared for the high school years that are skulking around the corner.  They want to get this right, but they’re unsure.   School administrators, grandparents, and well-meaning friends offer  “do this, do that” sound bites.  But, inertia and uncertainty prevail.

There are two distinct phases of home education, after the elementary years wind down: The Interrogatory Phase (middle school) and the Execution Phase (high school).

It is in the Interrogatory Phase that you learn what you will be doing in the Execution Phase.  The Execution Phase is a terribly busy time and as the name implies, you are putting into action all of the plans you made in the late middle school years.  If you wait until high school to ask the important questions, you will find yourself bogged down, confused, and feeling rather ineffective.

Regardless of what your long-term goals are, you should think of middle school as preparation for high school. Here are key components of middle school years:

                                                         Figure out your kid

What does my student love best and where does he/she excel?   For example:  Does she like to build things?  Is he quick with his math?  Does she read above grade level?  Can he write better than most boys his age?  Do topics in science, music, art, or history hold her attention more?

It might seem like a lot to know about your student but if you pay close attention to your days, the answers are there.  Your goal is to get an academic lock on your student and know his strengths, weaknesses, and special interests.  Pay attention to your student’s skill set and talents.  These are the headwaters from which good things can flow.


For an objective “stock-taking”, you’ll need to test. I am not a big advocate of testing, especially in elementary school, but by middle school you really need to get a fix on how your student measures up against the general population.  We are not very good scorekeepers for our own kids.

(There are many online resources for testing your student in the privacy of your home, if you prefer.  A google search will reap a harvest of them.) 

1.  You can have your older middle school student take the PSAT or the SAT.  Scores prior to 9th grade are purged – no one but you will ever see them.  You don’t have to get upset with low scores here because you will adjust down for his/her age.  For example, if your 7th grade student has an SAT math score of 500 – you should be very encouraged; that is quite good for that grade level.

2.  There is also a test called the SSAT (not administered by the College Board).  The SSAT is similar in shape to the SAT, is geared toward the middle school student, and it will give you a projected SAT score, depending on the age of your student when he takes this test.  The SSAT is a personal favorite of mine.

What does this testing accomplish?

1. You will have a reality check.

2. You will know where you need to concentrate your efforts.

3. If your student has real strength in one area, it will be revealed and you may have a ticket to gifted learning programs.

4. Since all of these achievement exams are (at minimum) 3 hours long, your student will know ahead of time what it feels like to sit through this endurance test.  Better your kid do this before it counts than do it for the first time when it really does count.


Is my student ready for high school?  Is he ready to work hard?  Does she know how to manage her time?  Does he know why he needs to do all of this work?  Are we on the same page?    

Most students do not know what they want to do with their lives.  But, they should still have goals. Without goals, how will you get them to study into the late hours of the night and on weekends when that time/need arrives.  It is very hard to push a kid who does not have a shared vision of excellence and achievement.  To instill this desire in your student, he must see the goal(s).  You should do college tours.  It might sound foolish to traipse across the campus of Columbia University with a middle school student – it is not.  Pick a beautiful day, travel without time constraint on a day when classes are in session, jump in to an organized tour or just walk the campus and hang in the nearby eateries to get a sense of the intellectual energy and excitement that you will find everywhere.   If you can get your student excited about attending ONE college, ANY college, then you are on the “go” square of the game board.  You can build goals from there.  Without this, you will find yourself parroting admonitions which will fall on deaf ears.  A student needs a tangible goal, especially if no particular career goal is present.  Invest in your student’s enthusiasm.

Does my middle school student even KNOW what hard work looks like?

This is critically important.  Your daughter might view 20 math problems per week as punitive.  Your son might think that a weekly 250 word essay is pure torture.  Most middle school students need to calibrate what they think is hard work to what hard work actually is. They need good models.  Middle school students who want to land in a competitive college need to meet other students with similar goals..  Your job is to find them. The homeschool community is filled with success stories.  Find the families who have high-achieving kids.  Ask them what they did.   If your 12 year old son or daughter sits down with a 21 year old who has a proven academic track record and they hear it straight from the source, they will never forget it.  It is golden.

To find peers, try to get your middle school student into one high-achieving program, whether online or through your local community.

                                                        From Ideas to Action Plans

During the Interrogatory Phase of the middle school years you should try out different things.  This takes time but it is worth it.   If math seems to come easy, find a math club.  If your student loves science, do science fairs.  If writing is at the top of the list, find contests and competitions to enter.  Your goal is to get some traction.  Once that happens you will see real progress. Advice for mom – get on numerous homeschool discussion loops and scour the digests from these groups nightly.  This is how you learn about cool, local opportunities.  You will  have to make a regular investment of time to do this research.  Here is a terrific website with lists and lists of competitions in science, art, history, math, computers and writing. A good place to start –  http://cty.jhu.edu/imagine/resources/competitions/index.html

This list includes a good number of competitions for middle school students.

If a student is preparing to compete for something  – anything – he will be more focused.  Then you (mom) can reverse-engineer your school year around this event.  Big events like these actually ADD structure to your year.

                                                           Plan, Plan, Plan Some More

Once you have gathered up activities, events and competitions, you are one easy step away from creating a calendar for the year with clear goals mapped out.  Keep going with this.  Do a hypothetical 4-year high school plan.  Involve your middle school student in this.    Of course, this plan is going to morph.  But if you have no plan at all, you are bound to fall short of a high standard.

                                                                Broaden Horizons

A desire to achieve and the determination to do hard things  won’t come out of thin air.  You need to nurture it.  There are wonderful educational events run by Learning Unlimited throughout the year.  Middle school students can take exciting classes on the campuses of some of the best universities in the country for as little as $30 for a full weekend of amazing courses.  No grades are given.  University students volunteer to teach. Often a middle school student discovers an entire field of science or language they did not even know existed. Inspiration is everywhere.  Do this!  Do it as often as you can.

http://www.learningu.org/current-programs  Get on the mailing list.  Have it on your calendar.  The MIT and Yale programs are especially good.

                                                                Your Leadership

Many years ago a homeschool family asked to meet with me.  Mom and dad could not get their kids to read books. They wanted advice.  Most home educating families know that in order to be poised for the academic world kids need to read  – a lot.  They need to read hard stuff and they need to read often.  These parents were worried.  Their kids did not have dyslexia or ADHD. They were neurotypical kids.  “Why can’t we get them to read?” they lamented.    I asked them what they (mom and dad) were currently reading, looking high and low for a sign of books.  “We don’t read, we don’t have time for it.”  Hmm.

The prescription is simple.  Kids will read more if you have a set reading time and lead by example.  Kids will also read in the absence of other forms of entertainment and if most table top surfaces hold a small stack of interesting books.

If your middle school kids are glued to glowing rectangles, have technology free hours built into the day and have good books ready to fill the gap.  It is harder now than it ever was before to encourage kids to read books.  The glowing screens hold far more appeal.  We cannot extricate ourselves from these devices entirely but we can claim back a few hours a day – this is a reasonable goal.  Lead the way on this.

                                               ~          ~          ~          ~          ~          ~

The middle school years are a period of intense mentorship.  It is during these years that you can establish that you and your student are on the same team.  The road to excellence is arduous, but it is made easier when the prize is clear, the goals are reasonable, and your leadership is obvious. You got this !   Godspeed !

Rosemary Laberee


The Center for Home Education Policy – A Solution in Search of a Problem

by Rosemary Ward Laberee

Homeschooling is an educational choice often misunderstood and much aligned. It is the
favorite whipping boy of the main stream media’s education coverage. This essay parses
the misguided efforts of a new organization which has goals of promoting more oversight
in homeschools and which naively hopes to guard against bad parenting – an ever present
iniquity found disproportionately more often in families who send their children to school
than in families who do not.
It was with great interest that I read The Washington Post Magazine’s article, by Lisa Grace Lednicer, on this new enterprise – The Center for Home Education Policy.
Greater Home Education Monitoring (March 2, 2017)
The young people who run this organization were homeschooled and their goal is to help those who do not like the homeschool life their parents have designed for them. The Center for Home Education Policy wants to help young men and women “escape” their homeschools, and, rather presumptuously, will offer some basic life skills support in the process.
Sarah Hunt and Carmen Green are rather accomplished young people (Rhodes Scholar candidate and Georgetown Law). They have an outstanding command of the king’s English, did well at college, and clearly know how to get a job done. This puts them head and shoulders above most of their brick-and-mortar-schooled peers. They are not poster children for some backwoods, Bible-thumping, slop-‘dem-hogs-or-else kind of parenting. I bet that the parents of these enterprising young adults are exceedingly proud of them, as well they should be.
The goal of The Center for Home Education is more government regulation of home education, but as this essay will point out, there are errors and omissions in their petition.
The most obvious problem is this: The Center for Home Education Policy zooms in on fundamentalist Christianity as a culprit while ignoring other forms of religion-motivated, segregating, educational options. This is troubling. If The Center for Home Education Policy truly cares about the isolating and rigid circumstances which can be found in extremely religious homes, and if they care about how hard it is for the young lives trapped there, then it would definitely need to put a wide-angle lens on the camera. Christians are not the only home educators out there. What about the solitariness of Amish children? What of the detachment of children in conservative, orthodox Judaism? Finally, what about the confinement, oppression and degradation of young Muslim girls? These cultures represent huge homeschool communities – why doesn’t the Center for Home Education Policy “go there”?
I think it is because they would not feel comfortable stomping around the sacred grounds of a culture they do not know, even if it does have practices which offend their sensibilities. Maybe they have more respect for the rituals of these religious cultures than for their own? Regardless, their approach to helping home educated youth seems biased. They appear to be on a targeted witch hunt, and it robs their goals of integrity and sincerity.
On the claims of abuse and starvation in these fundamentalist homes, it is imperative to point out the difference between families who are truant and families who home educate. Truant families do not send kids to school. Neither do they homeschool. They do nothing at all because they are bad people. Legislating home education will do nothing at all to save kids from bad parents and creating a police state where kids are checked up on regularly steps into a very menacing space. The corruption in large governmental, bureaucratic departments which aim to “help children” is legendary. Relying on any agency to verify the integrity of a homeschool (against whose standards?) has a distinctly Orwelian stench. Bad people who fail to send their kids to school ALWAYS claim to be homeschooling. Hunt and Green have erroneously conflated these two groups.
Think. How many public-school kids suffer at the hands of bad parents? Tragically, too many to count. Why don’t we blame public education for this? Why don’t we seek some oversight in these families? If a few of the 1.8 million homeschool kids are mistreated in their homes, this is a terrible thing. But here is a much worse statistic – thousands and thousands of kids, who are not homeschooled, are mistreated in their homes each year. Thousands of kids who attend public schools are victims of abuse. Kids who attend public school are also much more likely to be murdered – while AT the school. Child abuse is ghastly and heart-breaking and for the sake of those victims, I think we should interpret the data correctly.
Hunt and Green explain that many kids who were homeschooled in isolating circumstances need very basic life skills training and academic remediation as well. I have caught one or two rare glimpses of this, so I do not disagree entirely. But it is very disingenuous to suggest that this is common in home education. It is not common. It is rare. It is, however, very common to meet a middle schooler who attends a public school and who still cannot read. Of the young people who fill our prisons and who drop out of high school or college, the overwhelming majority went to a public school. (That is a very scary outcome.) Now, THIS looks like a good space to occupy if you want to make a real difference to the kids.
You see, the question that does need an answer is this: Why are so many young people who come out of our nation’s public schools not prepared for college, for life, and for self-sufficiency? Here is a problem that needs a solution, but it is not a problem generally found in homeschool homes.
More importantly, today’s headlines have revealed how public school students are narrowly formed around a bubble of progressive, politically-correct, left-of-center orthodoxy. The shocking events on our nation’s college campuses show us how very intolerant and viciously protective that isolating piece of society can be. (Here, I am referring to the isolation which public education molds.)
Now – take a look at the Nation’s Report Card


THIS is terrifying. None of the kids represented in these statistics were home educated. This is a crisis, a tragedy, and a terrible injustice. On a GRAND scale. How can one point fingers at a very few ill-prepared homeschool children, when an entire nation is facing an academic extinction event brought to us compliments of ….no, not home education…. but that wondrous alternative known as public education? The author of this article, Lisa Grace Lednicer, showed neither the Nation’s Report Card nor the Homeschool Report Card. Such an omission is not cool.
The numbers and the research speak volumes. This is why I think that The Center for Home Education Policy is a solution in search of a problem. Home education builds better citizens.
The problem is public education.
In the Washington Post article, Sarah Hunt explains that some homeschoolers do not even know what the SAT is. The direct opposite has been my experience. I have heard the same things, year in and year out, from homeschool teens who take the SAT or ACT. Homeschooled teens come away shocked at how oblivious the other students are about these tests. During the test breaks they listen to bewildered comments from the school kids, many of whom do not even know why they are there. These public school students are shocked to find out that the test is 3.5 hours long. They are shocked to learn that they must write an essay. They are shocked to learn that they must know Geometry to do the math portion. My own four kids (each took SAT 2 to 3 times in total) were flabbergasted at how unskilled and vulnerable these kids seemed. And they felt pity for them.
As someone who consults with parents during the college application process – parents of homeschoolers as well as parents of public school students – I can tell you that there is a huge difference between the two. Homeschool parents are much more aware of the requirements for graduation and the criteria for admission to college. For many homeschool families, the proof of the pudding arrives during the first year in college. This is when homeschool kids truly shine. Colleges are eager to have them and they thrive, while many of their public schooled peers do not.
I think that Hunt and Green have focused on the wrong data. To illustrate this point – imagine you are in a room where there are 100 young people who were very poorly educated and who come from wacky families. Now, imagine that 5 of them were home educated. How can you hope to be taken seriously when your take-away from this is that more regulation is needed in home education, when the real problem is in the BIG numbers … the 95 other people? It does not make sense.
The timing of this article and, indeed, the timing of the whole “homeschool monitoring” message is suspicious, given the present political climate. There is an elephant in the room, which may be the real reason for the howls for “home education monitoring”. It is this – the inevitable a la carte approach to education. If the US moves toward a voucher model for education then home education will grow even more. So, best to start the bleating and barking for more controls now, right?
I wish The Center for Home Education Policy well but remain convinced that they are a solution in search of a problem. I hope they turn their well-formed minds to the real problems in education, where they might rescue countless children lost in an intellectual and cultural wasteland.

Which of the following do you recommend: homeschooling (online) or the US public school system, and why?

My daughters on the verge of 2 years old and I have another one on the way. I’m wary about sending them to public school, because I personally didn’t learn a lot (a bit too easy) and it didn’t really help socially. While I know there are pros and cons to both, what are your point of views?

Written Apr 18

free to learn

Wow … you are way ahead of the game!


First of all … relax. You have plenty of time to figure things out and, who knows, the playing field may change significantly by school time.

Until that day comes, you have quite a bit of homework to do.

Your first assignment: What are your goals for your children? What do you want them to achieve as a result of their education?

Second assignment: What are the strengths and weaknesses of each child? How do they interact with others? Are they social, or not? Gifted? Any learning difficulties, etc?

Third assignment (and this question is just a start): What are the strengths and weaknesses of different educational choices, and how well do they fit each of your children?

The good thing is that you have several years to complete your assignments, before you make any decisions.

Now it’s time for me to answer your question.

But first, a digression.

There’s a body of research that suggests we should not begin to formally educate our children until they are older. Some studies indicate that it can actually provide negative performance outcomes. The consensus seems to be about age seven. Several European countries, including Sweden and Poland, do not require schooling until age seven.

Other researchers believe that it is far more important (and natural) to encourage our children to play during their formative years. Dr. Peter Gray has a lot to say about this, but we’ll talk some more about him later.

So, don’t be in a big rush to start your kids on the education hamster wheel. Anyway, back to our story.

Deciding on a specific curriculum greatly depends on the answers to the above assignments. In fact, it is entirely possible that each of your children will require a completely different approach.

Your question asks us to compare online versus traditional schooling. There are two major considerations for this comparison. The first is the adequacy of the curriculum, and that mostly depends on the classes that are chosen (both online and traditional). I have read no research that indicates online teaching is better than traditional. Ultimately, your children need to do the work to understand the concepts, and to demonstrate mastery. Whichever method is chosen will require someone to ensure they are “getting” the material. My view, from a curricular perspective, is that this is a toss-up. Either option could provide a really good, or really bad, education.

The second major consideration is the learning style and, in my view, this incorporates the degree of social activities and interaction required. Online learning tends to be more isolated. A classroom environment is more likely to foster group interaction. However, once again, each situation is different, so you have to be careful. My view on this one is mixed. Some kids thrive in a social environment, while others prefer to work in isolation. (It happens that our daughter prefers relative isolation – a large classroom is a bad environment for her. We also have friends whose homeschooled children have chosen to return to traditional school).

Therefore, your answer is … it depends.

But that’s just the beginning. You forgot to ask some other important questions.

For example … what other learning opportunities exist, other than online or traditional education?

And it turns out, there are lots of choices available. Here’s an excerpt from one of my other answers:

  • Unschooling. The interests of the child guide the focus of the learning.

  • Democratic schools (such as the Sudbury school system). The interests of the students guide the curriculum, but this occurs in a community environment.

  • Homeschooling, with the parents (or family members) as the teacher.

  • Homeschooling, with instruction guided by tutors.

  • Online education.

    • This also has its own spectrum, which ranges from selection of individual courses, to a complete curriculum. Online classes are available from grade school to graduate level.

  • Co-op classes – where homeschool families share responsibility for teaching.

  • Umbrella schools. These can also occupy a spectrum, but are generally a hybrid which may offer classes (or not). However, the idea of an umbrella school is to provide for administrative support (such as grades, or transcripts).

  • Dual enrollment. Homeschool students generally have the option of attending community college classes (if they meet minimum qualifications).

  • Charter schools. While some of these schools are essentially just regular schools run by businesses using taxpayer funds, others can be formed by parent groups. The specific rules for formation and administration of charter schools are determined by each state.

  • Private (and religious) schools. Privately funded schools.

  • Magnet schools. These are generally operated by the local school district, but with an emphasis on certain academic areas.

  • Traditional schools.

The beauty of homeschooling is that you don’t have to be restricted to one choice … there’s a whole smorgasbord available.

There is one other very important consideration. Some children have special needs, or have specific learning disabilities. While it may be possible, or even desirable, to homeschool, it is also quite possible that a traditional school has better resources available. Once again, carefully consider the alternatives. Traditional school may be the better choice.

Oops! I said I would mention more about Dr. Peter Gray, so here it is.

Peter Gray is a leading advocate and researcher who writes about unschooling. I find myself drawn to the philosophy of unschooling. I always seek to engage my daughter in choices about what, and how, she should learn. I recommend studying the principles, as it may help you clarify the educational goals you seek for your children.

Could a large group of parents that homeschool their children group together and form their own small private school?

Say for example a group of 50 parents decided to pool their resources, with parents teaching subjects that they know best, pooling their money and renting a building.

Is this legal in most states? How large could this homeschool group grow?


Written Apr 13

Think of schooling as a spectrum of choices. The result will therefore look something like this:

  • Unschooling. The interests of the child guide the focus of the learning.
  • Democratic schools (such as the Sudbury school system). The interests of the students guide the curriculum, but this occurs in a community environment.
  • Homeschooling, with the parents (or family members) as the teacher.
  • Homeschooling, with instruction guided by tutors.
  • Online education.
    • This also has its own spectrum, which ranges from selection of individual courses, to a complete curriculum. Online classes are available from grade school to graduate level.
  • Co-op classes – where homeschool families share responsibility for teaching.
  • Umbrella schools. These can also occupy a spectrum, but are generally a hybrid which may offer classes (or not). However, the idea of an umbrella school is to provide for administrative support (such as grades, or transcripts).
  • Dual enrollment. Homeschool students generally have the option of attending community college classes (if they meet minimum qualifications).
  • Charter schools. While some of these schools are essentially just regular schools run by businesses using taxpayer funds, others can be formed by parent groups. The specific rules for formation and administration of charter schools are determined by each state.
  • Private (and religious) schools. Privately funded schools.
  • Magnet schools. These are generally operated by the local school district, but with an emphasis on certain academic areas.
  • Traditional schools.

Parents should think carefully about which option is best suited for their children. As some of the other responses have noted, the choice to homeschool can be VERY dangerous if not done properly.

In my family’s case, we take advantage of several different options noted above. The overall philosophy is unschooling. I have found that engagement and motivation are highest when our daughter has expressed interest in particular subject areas.

The method of instruction varies. I prefer tutoring, as research shows that it is a very effective way of learning. However, I also know that project-based learning is very important (again, supported by research). Therefore, our daughter also participates in several classes (usually online).

Lastly, I believe that mathematics and English are essential ingredients for a basic education, so I ensure that they are a continuing part of the curriculum.

Also (and this may be viewed as heretical in the homeschooling community), I believe that standardized testing has an important role to play in education. I therefore have my daughter participate in annual standardized tests at our local school. This allows me to demonstrate that she is learning the minimum requirements compared to her peers; it will also demonstrate appropriate grade-level placement, if we decide she should return to the traditional school environment (which we don’t plan on doing, but you never know); and it will prepare her for similar testing in the future (e.g. SAT), which may be useful if she decides to pursue college (which is very likely).

So, with the exception of traditional schools (which receive their mandate from federal, state, and local school authorities), I believe it is possible for parents to get together and organize learning (or schools) at virtually all other levels.

What is the best routine for homeschooling?

I love school phrase handwritten by color chalks on the blackboard

Written Apr 11

The easy answer is … the routine that works for your children and your family.


When we send our children to a traditional school, we have shifted the burden of responsibility for their education to a “system” that provides limited choices. And the limitations extend far beyond just the curriculum. The choice of when to sleep, eat, go to the bathroom; the choice of how long to read or study a particular topic; the choice of travelling at a particular time, etc.


Do I choose to have my child start the homeschool day at 0800, and follow a specific schedule and curriculum? Why would I do this? I am only replicating the worst parts of a traditional school in my own home.


How do I choose what my child should study? In fact, is it even appropriate for me to choose what my child should study? What are my child’s strengths, weaknesses, and desires?

Therefore, because of choice, there is no “best” routine for homeschooling.

So, how do you choose what is best for your child.

In my view, the first place to start is with goals. Some parents choose lofty goals such as “doctor”, “lawyer”, or “Ivy League school”. Others may choose “whatever makes her happy”. Yet again, another response may be “I have no clue”. Other goals may involve religion, sports, art, music, etc.

Once you decide upon a goal(s), the next step is to determine the optimum means to achieve the goal.

If the goal is an Ivy League education, then you research the criteria for the school(s) … (and realize they may be different for homeschoolers) … and then design a curriculum to achieve the goal. If music is the goal, then lots of time for practice, etc.

The actual routine you select is, again, whatever fits best with your situation.

In our family, our (11 year-old) daughter is a “night” person. It is almost impossible to get her to do anything productive before 1000. Therefore, no learning activities are assigned before 1000 … it would be pointless.

For the remainder of the morning, she is “assigned” piano and violin practice, and any homework due for her upcoming classes.

The fact that she has “classes” is interesting. After conducting research on different learning options, I found that my educational philosophy aligns with “unschooling”. Most people assume that unschooling means that kids are allowed to freely roam through the educational landscape, without purpose or goals – just see where the fancy takes them. However, in our case, unschooling has developed into a discussion about what to learn, and how to learn. Then, as a result of these discussions, we choose a means to follow the interest. In our daughter’s case, that involves Latin, art, piano, violin, writing, reading, etc. Therefore, we have selected some (mostly online) classes to address those topics.

So, most of her “classes” are in the afternoon. Later in the day, she again practices piano and violin. The evenings may involve discussion, reading, etc. Mostly it is her own time – she may chat with her friends, pursue her passion of (digital) drawing or animation, or play games (mostly online with her friends). She often multitasks, and does several of these activities at the same time.

Another important aspect is to realize that your routine is likely to change over time. This is completely natural. Many families go through a period of adjustment before settling into a “routine”.